Sunday, May 9, 2010

Taking the Time

Armed with my favorite mustard Chuck Taylor lowtops, and an oversized black purse, and my hair in a defiant ponytail, I was determined to enjoy the last of the lingering twilight over the horizon.

I'd gone to the tailgate out by the ball field and noted the lush sprawling grass that lined the expanse between the vet school, road and myself. Two seconds went by , and an eternity lapsed between myself and the second I closed then reopened my eyes. As if by divine intervention, the Hahn horticulture Garden sprung up in my line of vision. With my inhibition still tied around me snugly, I obediently walked around the garden, the long way and nodded greeting to the passerby. A gentle breeze beckoned me to glance over yet again. This time though, I obeyed willingly and ran into the abyss of visual stimulation.

I suddenly felt 5 again. All the canopies of trees made a low celing that I ducked in and out of.

SNEEZE! Lovely. The moment I decide to enjoy nature I suffer the wrath of my nasolacrimal passage rejecting all that is of the wild. Just great.

But that didn't stop me. I ran to the edge of the small pond and stopped on my tip toes, daring to fall in the 5 inches of pond scum and neon orange khoi. Each in turn bobbed and nodded to the surface of the body of water then kept on their way.
"Do not feed the fish" sign cautioned me in my peripheral vision. I wonder how many visitors had adhered to that rule? I wondered, as I savored a dry hamburger bun.

The soft grass muffled my footsteps. Am I here alone? I suppose so. I dropped my burden and continued my progression deeper into the maze of tree trunks, fallen branches and overhanging wysteria. Out of boredom I began to pretend that I was being chased. Or perhaps I would chase a suited rabbit down its hole into a wonderland of tea parties and talking playing cards. I'm game.

Hmm, sniffle, sniffle,  SNEEZE! I must admit, as whimsical as this is, the creepy guy that just walked by may have just doubled back around again and given me the once-over. Ok. Time to go. Sensibility kicks in and my air passage tightens. Wheeze. Cough. Sniffle, sniffle. Ah, lovely. Just lovely.

Two minutes later I pass by dorms and dining halls to my right. I could potentially prolong my getting home by meddling with the friends that would love to see me. However, this was without a doubt the first time in a long time that no one was expecting me to be anywhere at any time and I had no immediate deadlines. The realization was dangerously liberating. No deadlines or expectations awaited me. I was transported to a blissful childlike state yet again. I ran, again without direction, purpose or cause. Just because it felt right.

Feelings. Quite an unexplored section of my brain. Tick, tick, tick. I could feel the neurons in my brain in overdrive as I took in the colors, sights and sounds.

I stood again, in awe of my surroundings. Closing my eyes, I pointed my nose skyward and let the warm glow of the sun bathe my face and sink into my eyelids. No adventure would be compete without a prodding stick to work with.

Tiny, sweet, innocent and vulnerable little bundles of brown and yellow down tottered behind their mother as I approached. I tried to still them by making duck calling noises. Perhaps I used the wrong one? She stopped, cocked her beak in my  direction as if to listen momentarily, and continued on her way.

The makings of peat maybe? or something like it. An unmistakable scent of eggs and fungi followed me. In the stillness I was awed. It somehow felt like a moment out of a CGI film. Did places like this still exist? Apparently so.

It's that moment where you realize that some things are just beyond the confines of time, space, age, limit, bound, nationality, race and status. The stillness quieted me, I was no longer a child, but a transient being that surpassed time and space. I was myself. So much more, yet so much less, yet better in that one instant. I'm here once for a very short time. And for what it's worth, every second is made even more amazing by the passage of time and it's resolution.

I knew in that moment that I'd miss this place, too much to accept and everything with it.

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